Day 52: Longing for "Egypt"

During the 40 years in which the Children of Israel wandered in the wilderness, there were times when they longed to return to Egypt.  In Exodus 14:12 with their backs against the Red Sea they said:

"...It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert!"

In Exodus 16:3 when they had no food to eat they said:

"...If only we had died by the LORD’s hand in Egypt! There we sat around pots of meat and ate all the food we wanted...."

And in Numbers 20:5 when they had no water to drink they said:

"Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to this terrible place? It has no grain or figs, grapevines or pomegranates. And there is no water to drink!"

In each instance, the children of Israel had grown weary and frightened.  They had no idea where they were going, they had forgotten what they had been delivered from, and all they wanted to do was go home.  The Promise Land seemed vague and mysterious, and crazy as it may seem, they longed for the false-security of their bondage in Egypt.

Confession: As much as I hate to admit it, in the past few days I have found myself longing to return to "Egypt".  I am weary and frightened.  I have no idea where we are going, I can't remember the former chaos that led to this separation, and I just want my old life back.  I don't want to keep trudging through the wilderness and making trips over the mountains every two weeks. The turmoil of our former lives has faded into the background, and I find myself longing for the "good ol' days".  Except that they weren't good, but like the Israelites, I am prone to wander and apt to forget.

And where was God in the midst of the Israelites' short-sighted wandering?  In spite of their fear, their complaints, and their doubt, God parted the Red Sea, rained down manna and quail from heaven, and brought forth water from a rock (on more than one occasion!).  He led them, fed them, protected them, and even blessed them!  Nehemiah recounts it well:

"You divided the sea before them, so that they passed through it on dry ground....  In their hunger you gave them bread from heaven and in their thirst you brought them water from the rock....  Because of your great compassion you did not abandon them in the wilderness. By day the pillar of cloud did not fail to guide them on their path, nor the pillar of fire by night to shine on the way they were to take.  For forty years you sustained them in the wilderness; they lacked nothing, their clothes did not wear out nor did their feet become swollen.  You gave them kingdoms and nations.... You made their children as numerous as the stars in the sky.... They ate to the full and were well-nourished; they reveled in your great goodness."  (Nehemiah 9:11, 15, 19, 21-23, 25 NIV)

And so, in spite of my current struggles, I will stay the course and in time, I believe my longing for "Egypt" will cease.  Until then, I will trust in the God of the Israelites to guide us to our promise land and pray fervently that we don't manage to find a way to turn 1 year into 40!